Presidential Candidates out of touch with the common man? Shocking(not)

Is anybody really surprised by the fact that a couple of rich guys running for national office are more than a little out of touch with the financial realities of American families? Is everyone in the U.S. electorate cursed with a short memory? Wasn't it George the Elder that had never seen a grocery store scanner before? And wasn't it George the Lesser that had no idea how much a gallon of milk cost during a town hall Q&A session? When was the last time these guys had to scrape up enough money to feed their family for a week? Or decide on buying gas for the car or prescriptions?

Now I could really care less how many houses somebody owns whether its 7, 8 or 9. And furthermore would we really want somebody couldn't afford one house running the country? But on the other hand it would be nice if we figure out someway as a prerequisites to run for office that they are required to work at Walmart for a year or two, with no health insurance or the any other of the bazillion perks they are entitled to as U.S. Senators. Let's just see how well they do.

Fast Food Blues

1. Working third shift and just trying to get through a typical week, I find myself going to a fast food restaurants about 6 times a week. 30 years ago twice a month would been a lot. (yes I am old enough to remember a time before Mcdonalds). And over the last 30 years I have noticed the following changes:

1. It now takes twice as long to get your order
2. Your are twice as likely to get your order wrong
3. Fast food workers are far more likely to be rude
4. Fast food workers are harder to understand
5. Errors in making change are far more likely

Going to a Mcdonalds used to be 10 minute breeze, now it's a 20 minute ordeal. Recently I went through a Mcdonalds and I noticed that both employees at both windows had their phones out texting. I know that working at a Mcdonalds is not the most demanding job, but couldn't you wait until you were done with your customer before you whip out your Blackberry(How do Fast Food employees afford Blackberry's anyway? )

Here's my list of the top 5 fast restaurants(or bottom 5 if you prefer) in terms of poor service and general incompetence.

1. Kentucky Fried Chicken
2. Arbys
3. Taco bell
4. Mcdonalds
5. Wendys
   

Now I am having a hard time coming up with a 5 best, but here are the best in my experience:

1. Tim Hortons
2. Subway
3. Quiznos
4. White Castles

Four is the best I can do, Burger King is highly location dependent as is Hardees. I suppose that the answer is to be a better time manager and fix my own food.

Until that day:

Emoose out

Embarassed by my hometown again.

I am originally from Cincinnati Ohio. I used to be really proud of that fact. If someone said something negative about my town I would spring to her defense. When I lived there, there was a lot to be proud of. The history, the great institutions, the arts and the sports teams to name a few of the things that made it a great place to live. Oh sure there were a few negatives, namely enough conservatism to to border on the ludicrous. I now reside in Dayton and even though it's only about 50 miles away, it is like a different planet. The first thing I noticed when I came to Dayton was the porn shops. Many of the main stream video stores had x rated movie sections. Now I haven't been back to Cincy for awhile, but I bet they still don't have naughty book stores.

Of course you'll remember the big dust ups over the Maplethorpe exhibition, The whole Larry Flynt fiasco and who could forget the King's bookstore debacle. I don't know about you, but I don't need the Hamilton County Sheriff's department advising me on my selection of viewing or reading materials. Just another example of the nanny state mentality. Just a pack of old farts that want to control me and you and decide what's best for us. No thanks.

Now we have a new situation. This time at least it's not in Cincinnati proper, but a suburb to the north. The Lakota High School drama department was about to put on the classic play "Ten Little Indians", based on the Agatha Christie story. Just about every drama club or class from junior high on up has done this play. Most people would consider it as a classic. That much I did know. What I did not know was that the original title used a pejorative used to denigrate African Americans *(technically African British Subjects I suppose).

Need less to say the P.C. people(I bet they were as ignorant of the original title as I was)demanded the cancellation of the performance. Some one called the school board and threatened a protest. That's all it took. I admit the world will not stop turning on it's axis if this play is not performed, but I do contend that we are all a little less free every time something like this happens. How do you justify this? The answer is: You can't! Do we have to give up our right of self expression just because it might offend somebody? If every thing that offended me were censored the Trinity Broadcasting Network would have been put out of its misery years ago. Now those guy are offensive! Those hairdos they sport definitely need to be censored. Have you seen that old broad with the pink hair and the big white dogs?

It's time for an official Emoose reality check: the play and the book have absolutely nothing to do with African Americans, Native Americans or any aboriginal peoples of any sort. True, the original title did contain the word n______, but I bet that every school library worth a damn has at least one copy of Huckleberry Finn. Check out a copy sometime if you have never read it. If you are too lazy to do so, I'll save you the effort: One of the main characters goes by the name *N_____ Jim. Should we ban Mark twain just in case we offend somebody? Should we censor Merchant of Venice because we might offend Jews?

Frankly people, we need to push the envelope. I think we need to be offended once and while, it helps us sort our priorities and set our own limits. How did we all get so damned thin skinned? A few years ago a public official giving a speech used the word niggardly. There was an immediately an outcry. There was an immediate demand for his ouster. A quick look in a Websters would have solved the dilemma. The word has nothing to do with black people(African Americans). (It just means stingy, look it up). Should we censor ourselves on the basis of who might "accidentally" offend because of some one's poor vocabulary

Part of the problem is that there is no equivalent for the n word that applies to white people. I think in the interest of equality we should invent or re-purpose a word and automatically accept it as racial epithet. You know, a word that gets uttered by someone just before the fists fly. If anyone reading these word has any suggestions please let me know. Until someone comes up with a better one I nominate "skunge". I don't think it's taken, but I like it. One syllable and you can really put a lot venom behind it, such as"you filthy skunge"! What do you think?I know all the other minorities have scarfed all the really good pejoratives, but we are a little late coming to the party. So any way if you really want to get on my good side please address me as an Irisharabenglishjewishcajun American.

In conclusion my skunge brothers:

Lakota High School board of Ed please please grow a pair and let those kids put on their play they've worked so hard on. And please let's all work together to put a halt to pussifacation of America!

Peace out, my skunge homies!


*Yes I too am a victim of political correctness and yes I mean the n word.

Holiday rant Mark II

Once again it's that time of year. That time that my poor little addled brain starts to take a depressive dive. I have so many mixed feelings about the standard christian holidays. Having been brought up as a J.W.,  I am flooded with residual guilt. Even though I haven't been a practicing witness in close to thirty years, those feelings still linger.  It was bad enough growing up a J.W. when you actually believed what I was taught, but then you find out it was all a big lie, you want to hate everybody and every thing. No matter what, I will always feel conflicted. On one hand I have my wife that was brought up in a fairly straight forward Methodist family. They celebrated the holiday's  just about like ninety percent of the country. To me the the whole affair was like visiting foreign country not knowing the language or the customs.

I've always liked for my kids to have a a good Christmas and get their fair share of goodies. But sometimes I feel I have failed to give them the complete holiday experience, I just can't "get the Christmas spirit". If I were by myself  I would probably not celebrate  any holiday.  It is just about impossible for me to get enthused. I can't even offer or return a merry Christmas greeting without nudging myself a little further down the depression chute. I sometimes wish that could spend Christmas in some Jewish or Muslim country or maybe hibernate fromThanksgiving till New Years. (There are no agnostic or atheist countries as far as 

I know.)

People will go out of their way to personally wish me Merry Christmas, and to this day that gives me the creeps. Oh I know that  at its worst it's probably benign. Sometimes I want to start in on these people and point out all the things they've got wrong about the holiday and the whole christian thing. But what would be the point? For some people that silly holiday is they have. And if it makes them happy, well I guess in the grand scheme of things(if there is such a thing) it really doesn't make a whole hell of a lot of difference. Like they say in France: "Whatever keeps the dog off the furniture. "

To make matters worse I have spent quite a few years in retail and seen first hand the Christmas insanity. People with that glazed over thousand yard stare. It is down right scary. I just don't think a lot of people are getting the supposed "reason for the season. I also have a feeling that a lot of those Christmas drones out there might actually like to come over to my side and avoid the hassle altogether. So many of them have that "please put me out my misery" air about them. 

Millions of people are right this minute are streaming toward home, or at least making their plans for Christmas. A sort of pilgrimage toward that feeling of connectedness that they in many cases have deluded themselves into thinking they once had but never really had. (Am I or am I not the master of the run on sentence?) I have never really felt connected until I had a family of my own. I have always felt like an outsider, even with my parents and sisters. Maybe it was from the big age gap between myself and my sisters or the whole religion thing. Throw in my bizarre mental hang ups, and it's amazing that I am even close to sane. (Yeah I know, you call that sane? har har!) 

As we get closer to the holiday my feelings of foreboding will intensify and hopefully 

I'll get through the holiday with out a melt down. So in any case have a nice safe holiday and please leave me the hell alone!

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